Jessica Simpson Should Stop Making Movies That Involve Clothing
December 29, 2007, 1:44 am
Filed under: movies | Tags: , , , ,

It’s official. Jessica Simpson can’t generate interest in her movies unless she’s doing this:

(image via

We all know Jessica Simpson isn’t exactly the world’s greatest actress. Nobody expects her to grab a Golden Globe nom, an Academy Award, or any kind of critical acclaim whatsoever. But what we do expect is this:

In fact, that was the only draw to 2005’s “Dukes of Hazard” which made $30.7 million and was number one at the box office for its opening weekend. Her latest attempt at acting, however, did not prove as successful. “Blonde Ambition”made $1,322 on it’s opening weekend, according to Page Six.

What could have gone so wrong? What kind of disaster had to occur for this film to bomb at the box office? Doesn’t Jessica Simpson have loyal fans?

The answer to this question is simple; YES. Jessica Simpson has loyal fans, but they don’t want to see her clothed. Want to know why nobody went to see “Blonde Ambition?” Take a looksie at the poster…

As we can see, she’s clearly wearing far too much clothing to draw any hormone-charged pre-pubescent boys, sexually confused women, and gay hair stylists. When it comes down to it, Jessica Simpson’s movie career all comes down to a simple mathematical equation. Jessica(amount of nakedness)=money. Jessica may be a good singer, and interesting candidate for a reality TV show, but let’s leave the acting to the pros mmmkay?

Unless, of course, she’s washing cars in her bikini.

Wanna watch the movie in its entirety?

You pitiful fool, Click HERE


Who Banked in 2007??

Forbes came out with an annual list on who banked the most with what in 2007.

1. George Lucas (63) – $200,000,000 for licensing toys to Hasbro.

2. 50 Cent (32) – $100,000,000 from owning just over 4% in equity of Glaceau. The company was recently acquired by Coca Cola, making Glaceau’s value skyrocket.

3. Howard Stern (53) – $82,000,000 from Sirius Radio for bringing his show there and upping subscriptions from the hundreds of thousands to the millions.

4. Jay-Z (38) – $82,000,000 from selling the clothing label he co-founded, Rocawear.

5. Sammy Hagar (60) – $80,000,000 for selling 80% of his Cabo Wabo tequila company.

To see the rest, click more!

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LiLo’s in a Stitch!
December 28, 2007, 2:29 pm
Filed under: LiLo | Tags: , , , , , ,


(Photo via Pacific Coast News)

Our favorite freckled, speckled, head-to-toe Ho, LiLo, is in some deep shizz.

Remember former boyfriend Riley Giles whom she met while in rehab? Well, not only did he say Lilo was a nympho and a sex-aholic, telling Britain’s News of the World she “quit coke and got hooked on sex with me,” he’s now threatening to release and sell some intimate pictures.

Oh Lindsay, you inspire us. Your slutty antics and crack-headed ways force us to desire to write more than just a silly entry about you… hence, here’s a poem…a poem inspired by you and dedicated to you, hope you like it!


An Ode to Lindsay

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Wanna Bail Mischa Out?
December 28, 2007, 2:04 am
Filed under: Celebs and the Law | Tags: , , , , , , ,

Mischa, Mischa, Mischa…

DUI. Posession of Illegal Narcotics. Driving without a license.

The 21-year-old actress was pulled over early Thursday morning in West Hollywood. She’s in custody. Bail is set at $10,000. Any takers? Anyone?

Oh Mischa, we almost thought you were innocent.

Tis the season to get engaged?
December 28, 2007, 1:41 am
Filed under: Reality TV | Tags: , , , ,

Good things come to those who wait…and also apparently to those who get regularly embarrassed on TV! Click to see which reality TV star is finally getting married after a long string of nationally broadcast heartbreaks.

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James Marsden Does GQ
December 27, 2007, 1:02 pm
Filed under: Editorial Spreads, James Marsden, The Zine Rack | Tags: , , ,

This year was James Marsden’s year. He’s had a most awesome 2007 with breakthrough roles in Hairspray, and Enchanted. He’s also starring alongside Katherine Heigl in 27 Dresses which comes out soon. With great bone structure and physique, he’s a born model. But the thing that we love is that the man doesn’t take himself too seriously.

Click more for other pictures

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She’s Bridealicious
December 27, 2007, 12:37 pm
Filed under: Fergie Fug

Our favorite Pea, Fergie Fug, is getting hitched to longtime Las Vegas boyfriend Josh Duhamel. The couple, who denied getting married anytime soon because they were “practically married anyway,” broke the news to E! Entertainment.

“I’m madly in love with him,” Fergie Fug said of her now fiancé. “He understands how to treat a woman and give me respect.”